Breaking up is hard to do…
No, I’m not talking about the Carpenters…
or Neil Sedaka….
The raw fact is, breaking up sucks.
I’ve had family, friends, co-workers and acquaintances go through break ups, and:
(…Stop sweating, this isn’t ABOUT you…)
Rarely is it easy… Almost never entirely mutual… And FAR too often ends up devolving from Love and going to Indifference*, without getting a chance of stopping at Friendship.
Sometimes, when there are kids or pets, it can get… ugly. And that is what I am writing about today.
On my travels, I pass through a major intersection in Pitt Meadows, and for the better part of a year, I have seen a sign that is extremely well glued onto the back of a traffic sign. In black block letters, on medium green paper, it says: “XXXXX XXXXX** IS A DEADBEAT DADDY”
I don’t know the guy, and I did go so far as to try to see if he was listed in the phone book, and couldn’t find him… but someone has spent a LOT of time, trying to scrape away the name, whereas no attempt has been made at the bottom portion of the sign, where the paper has actually detached from the sign. Apparently, XXXXX XXXXX (or one of his friends) only cared that the name get removed, and not the claim that he was a deadbeat.
It seems to me, that it was pretty innovative, on the side of the mother, to take felt pen to paper, and superglue to sign.
But how absolutely sad, that she had to go to that length.
Up close, you can see the effort that was put into getting the name portion removed.
Apparently that same effort wasn’t put into his contact and support of his family.
Like I say, I don’t know the people involved, but it made me very sad.
I guess maybe for some, breaking up ISN’T hard to do… I guess some folks can move on, and not look back, at all !
*Taken from Elie Wiesel‘s quote:
“The opposite of love is not hate, it’s indifference. The opposite of art is not ugliness, it’s indifference. The opposite of faith is not heresy, it’s indifference. And the opposite of life is not death, it’s indifference.”
** I think I spent more time deciding whether I should obscure his name, than I did writing the story. At the end of the day, I decided to obscure it because a) I don’t know the facts BEHIND the poster, so I’ve only heard one side… and b) because the guys name isn’t the point. The point is the extreme lengths she had to go to, to try to shame him into meeting his obligations.